


Bring a Kiss to a Knife Fight

by PrincessAutumnArcher



Series: Lokasenna [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: All's Fair in Love and War AU, But Like...Stabbing 😏, F/M, Flirting, Fluff, Idiots in Love, Loki with a Knife, Quick Read, Sparring as foreplay, Stabbing, Tricksters, Verbal Sparring, Wingman Sam Wilson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-09
Updated: 2020-04-09
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:41:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23556967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrincessAutumnArcher/pseuds/PrincessAutumnArcher
Summary: It started off as a playful debate between friends, and became a dare you couldn't resist. Now Loki's got you set on proving that a kiss does nothing in a knife fight...or does it?{Same reader/AU as All's Fair in Love and War! Potentially canonbeforethe events ofAll's Fair in Love and War. ;) }
Relationships: Avengers Team & Reader, Loki (Marvel)/Reader
Series: Lokasenna [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1385197
Comments: 2
Kudos: 64





	Bring a Kiss to a Knife Fight

“It’s not cheating, it’s being resourceful!”

“That’s low…it’s not a fair fight.”

“How many fair knife fights have you been in, Thor?” you demanded, staring incredulously at him before glancing at the other couch for backup. “Come on guys, seriously! If someone’s rushing at me with murderous intent, distraction is just part of the general defense!”

Bucky shook his head with a chuckle, but Natasha shrugged and took a thoughtful sip of her tea. “Fair point. Your body is a weapon and all that.”

“Wait, we talkin’ distraction as in smooch-smooch, bedroom eyes, or kick to the crown jewels?” Sam cut in. “Because there’s dirty fighting, and then there’s fighting dirty.”

“Does it make a difference?” You kept your skeptical gaze locked with Sam’s over the rim of your own mug.

“Hell yes, there’s a difference!”

“You’re evading the question.”

Your eyes (and those of everyone else in the room) snapped to Loki. He sat nonchalantly on the other side of Thor, sipping away at his tea. His eyes lifted to meet yours and you fought the urge to blink under his cool, almost goading gaze.

“What?” Your voice sounded foreign to your own ears and you winced internally at how aggressive your response had ended up. Natasha’s eyes flickered from your face to Loki’s, an almost imperceptible smirk landing on her features.

“You’re evading the question,” Loki repeated casually, with a hint of a lopsided grin. “Mr. Wilson—”

“Okay man, I feel like you’re on my side here, but ‘Mr. Wilson’ makes me feel old as ba—”

“—he asked if you wanted to seduce or castrate your opponents. So do tell, sorceress. Which is it?”

The world rang in your ears as you processed Loki’s words. Thor’s laughter felt like a muffled buzzer beside you, melting into the laughter-white noise of the others.

Loki’s smug smile fairly glittered in the light as you inhaled a too-hot gulp in an attempt to hide your shock. The scalding liquid snapped you back to your senses (thankfully) and you managed to deliver your next words as a clever answer rather than a spluttering concession.

“Why not both?”

You fought to keep your voice perfectly steady—the slightest sign of fragility and Loki would pounce, you just knew it. The prospect of repartee with him was both exhilarating and horrifying: you loved the thrill of playing word games with him, of dancing around his traps and insinuations while laying your own, but dreaded the inevitable fall afterwards, when you would fool yourself into thinking that a bit of banter had built up some pale friendship between yourself and the fallen prince, only to find yourself severely, completely mistaken.

“Oh? Greedy.”

Damn. He wanted a full game and knew you couldn’t stay away.

The other people in the room seemed to fall away—though how you could ever forget about the larger-than-life debate currently flinging itself between your teammates, you’d never know—as you directed a crooked grin at Loki.

“Like I said earlier…” You cut him a shrewd, tilted look over your mug, beginning to enjoy yourself despite the bubble of apprehension bouncing in your chest. “Every distraction has its place. Why use just one hand when you’ve got two?”

Loki laughed, a soft but insidious ripple that wound around you far too easily. He leaned forward on his knees, forcing you to mirror him and awkwardly curve around Thor.

“You’d be surprised what’s possible with one hand.”

The glint in his eyes decided your words before your own brain did, although the purring razor sewn into the edge of your voice was all your own doing.

“You’re well-versed then?” You dropped your eyes briefly to the hand resting loosely on his leg, fingertips just grazing the crisp black cloth over his inner thigh. When you met his eyes again, the look in his celadon eyes had shifted to blatantly daring. A hint of a laugh curled the edge up on your smile and you held Loki’s gaze cheekily. “Had lots of practice over the eons?”

His eyebrow ticked upwards before settling down low and angled over his brow. “Are you asking for lessons?”

Your nostrils flared for a moment before you leaned in deeper over Thor’s knee, ignoring the hoots of laughter from the couch across from you. “Best part about knowing how to use both is that the one-handed tricks just don’t work on me anymore. I’m sure your pillow appreciates your expertise, though.”

A muttered “damn” from across the room brightened your grin, but the look on Loki’s face darkened to downright dangerous. A sudden cough of something that sounded awfully like “get a room” snapped your head back around to face a very amused-looking trio on the couch opposite.

“You’re awfully confident,” Loki remarked silkily. When you looked back at him, brows tugging upwards in incomprehension, he smiled pleasantly.

Your eyes narrowed.

“I trust my experience,” you said finally, when your waiting was rewarded with nothing but a silent continuation of Loki’s benign, utterly maddening grin. “Kisses don’t bring much to a knife fight.”

Loki’s eyes _gleamed_ with satisfaction as he leaned even further over his brother to whisper, “Is that so?”

It was a bad idea to step into his gilded trap. A terrible one, in fact. An absolutely, irrevocably awful idea.

Knowing that didn’t stop you from curling your lips into a vulpine grin of your own, stretching one hand out to tenderly trace Loki’s jaw, and whispering back, “Yes. It really is.”

It only surprised you a little when Loki caught your other hand just before your knuckles slammed into his crotch. One dark eyebrow cocked up as he regarded you with a mischievous, mirthful twist on his lips and told you, “Save that for the actual knife fight, then.”

“Wha…”

You stared after him as he stood and swept out of the room, tossing you a tilted, wicked little smile as he went. Sam raised his eyebrows and Natasha leaned back, looking supremely self-satisfied.

Thor cleared his throat and you snapped out of your daze, two very important realizations crashing into you simultaneously: one, Loki was actively plotting some tricky knife-verbal-physical fight against you, and two, you were humble enough to admit that your skills didn’t make you immortal.

“OhmygodThor—your brother’s going to stab me!” you blurted, eyes rounding as you seized Thor’s arm.

The rumble of his chuckle wasn’t deep enough to drown out Sam snickering, “Yeah, he’s gonna do some _stabbing_ , alright,” as he slid his index finger through a ring formed by his other hand. “All night long…”

“Oh, shut up, Wilson!” You tossed the nearest couch pillow at him.

“Fear not,” Thor told you jovially, patting you spiritedly, “just avoid picking up snakes for a while—even if they’re not green.”

Your friends’ laughter surrounded you, but it still wasn’t loud enough to drown out your internal (and external) groaning.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, hope you're all doing well! I've been having a bit of writer's block, so the update for All's Fair in Love and War is a little delayed, but I wanted to post this in the meantime. It's pretty short (and unedited lol whoops), but I hope it's a fun quarantine read!
> 
> Let me know if you guys have prompts/ideas in the comments!


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